Casting Call
Apr. 7th, 2011 12:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
capt_facepalmDay 06 – Whatever Tickles Your Fancy ~ Captain Facepalm: Casting Director
Huzzah! A new gaslight Sherlock Holmes is about to go into production and I, Captain Facepalm, have been given the assignment to cast the leads of Holmes and Watson.
Scene I (Watson)
Scene VI (Holmes)
Huzzah! A new gaslight Sherlock Holmes is about to go into production and I, Captain Facepalm, have been given the assignment to cast the leads of Holmes and Watson.
Scene I (Watson)
Christian Bale: I'm here to read for the role of Sherlock Holmes.
Capt_Facepalm: Actually, we're casting Watson today.
CB: Which one is he?
CFP: Umm.. He's the other one.
CB: You mean, the sidekick?
CFP: Well, yes. But he's awesome... He carries a gun, and he fights really well.
CB: He's a sidekick. I don't do sidekicks! I'm &^%$%^& Batman!
Capt_Facepalm: Actually, we're casting Watson today.
CB: Which one is he?
CFP: Umm.. He's the other one.
CB: You mean, the sidekick?
CFP: Well, yes. But he's awesome... He carries a gun, and he fights really well.
CB: He's a sidekick. I don't do sidekicks! I'm &^%$%^& Batman!
Scene II (Watson)
Cary Elwes: I'm here to read for the role of Dark!Watson.
Capt_Facepalm: I'm sorry, did you say "Dark" Watson?
CE: Err, yes. He's like Watson, only evil.
CFP: Oh. I see. I really don't think that is what the director has in mind.
CE: But I look great in black and in a mask! And I have only managed to get villainous roles lately.
CFP: I'm sorry. This just is not going to work.
CE: Inconceivable!
Capt_Facepalm: I'm sorry, did you say "Dark" Watson?
CE: Err, yes. He's like Watson, only evil.
CFP: Oh. I see. I really don't think that is what the director has in mind.
CE: But I look great in black and in a mask! And I have only managed to get villainous roles lately.
CFP: I'm sorry. This just is not going to work.
CE: Inconceivable!
Scene III (Watson)
Ricky Gervais: I'm here. You can send everyone else home.
Capt_Facepalm: Mr Gervais, how did you find us?
RG: Well it was very strange. My agent had a hard time getting information about this casting call.
CFP: Oh?
RG: I showed up at the posted location, in the abandoned aquarium, but you must have left.
CFP: Oh?
RG: I then followed a lead to an abandoned warehouse, but you weren't there either. Funny, that.
CFP: Oh?
RG: I happened to stop at the pub for a Fosters, and the barkeep told me that you were here.
CFP: Oh. Well, don't call us, we'll call you!
Capt_Facepalm: Mr Gervais, how did you find us?
RG: Well it was very strange. My agent had a hard time getting information about this casting call.
CFP: Oh?
RG: I showed up at the posted location, in the abandoned aquarium, but you must have left.
CFP: Oh?
RG: I then followed a lead to an abandoned warehouse, but you weren't there either. Funny, that.
CFP: Oh?
RG: I happened to stop at the pub for a Fosters, and the barkeep told me that you were here.
CFP: Oh. Well, don't call us, we'll call you!
Scene IV (Watson)
Matthew McConaughey: Hey y'all. Ahm here to read for the role of Doctah Wahtson.
Capt_Facepalm: Welcome! Can you lose the accent?
MM: Whaht ahccent?
CFP: Nevermind. Next. (sigh)
Capt_Facepalm: Welcome! Can you lose the accent?
MM: Whaht ahccent?
CFP: Nevermind. Next. (sigh)
Scene V (Watson)
Ewan McGregor: I'm here to read for the role of Watson.
Capt_Facepalm: Can you do a Scottish accent?
EM: I am Scots!
CFP: Oh. Sorry. My bad. This will be an action role. Will this present a problem?
EM: Have you even seen any of my work?
CFP: Can you grow a moustache?
EM: Sure. Watch this!
CFP: Wow! I did not mean on command. That's very impressive. We'll be in touch!
Capt_Facepalm: Can you do a Scottish accent?
EM: I am Scots!
CFP: Oh. Sorry. My bad. This will be an action role. Will this present a problem?
EM: Have you even seen any of my work?
CFP: Can you grow a moustache?
EM: Sure. Watch this!
CFP: Wow! I did not mean on command. That's very impressive. We'll be in touch!
Scene VI (Holmes)
Hugh Jackman: Hello...
Capt_Facepalm: ♥ YOU'RE HIRED! ♥
HJ: ...I'm here to read for Holmes?
Capt_Facepalm: ♥ YOU'RE HIRED! ♥
HJ: ...I'm here to read for Holmes?
