Sorry, Wrong Number

[capt_facepalm]

Title: Sorry, Wrong Number
Author: capt_facepalm
Rating: PG
Fandom: Sherlock Holmes (Gaslight ACD)
Characters: Sherlock Holmes, retired to Sussex and regretting installing a telephone 
Summary: Holmes' last words before hanging up (a top-ten list)
Warning: (craic)
Word Count: 100
Author's Notes: July 24th 2020 prompt: The Wonder of the Age

.oOOo.

‘No thanks. I grow my own belladonna.’

‘Watson? You’re not Watson.’

‘No, I don’t want to get rid of the mice.’

‘No, Mycroft. Just no.’

‘I wasn’t disguising my voice. I’m not here.’

‘Inspector, I retired away from London so I would not have to review your cases.’

‘Dr Watson is not here, and no, he doesn’t want to hear your plot idea.’

‘The ones I like are discontinued, so I won’t be ordering any Girl Guide biscuits.’

‘I know the Nigerian royal line quite well, and you are not amongst them.’

‘No, I do not require a beekeeper’s apprentice.’

.oOOo.

Please sign the guestbook

---

Supplementary Notes: We've been here before, July 8, 2016 in Days of Miracle and Wonder .
Also, this was inspired by responses to comments left in an earlier drabble (now where is that link?)

Comments

[smallhobbit]

I may use the first myself in future.

[capt_facepalm]

I thought number eight would be up your street as well. I hate those things. Probably because I was forced to sell them as a Junior_Facepalm.
Thanks!

[gardnerhill]

"Look, Mr. Bell, I'm not Watson, and if you call one more time asking him to come over there because you want him you and I will have words."

[capt_facepalm]

'Mr. Watson – Come here – I want to see you,' said the voice on the telephone contraption.

'See here, Mr Bell, if you wish to see Dr Watson, you must say "Come at once if convenient. If inconvenient, come all the same." That has been my experience at any rate. Good day to you.'

[gardnerhill]

And of course I loved that last one very much. (Considering how many times I've had Dr. Watson take out perky teen girls hitting on Holmes...)

[capt_facepalm]

I confess, "borrowed" that one from you!

[mightymads]

I especially liked #7

[capt_facepalm]

Thanks! I do too. "Real" authors have little time for fan-ficcers.

[debriswoman]

Particularly taken with 5

[capt_facepalm]

Holmes' telephone!fail.
Soon to be followed up with "Please leave your message at the sound of the ear-shattering shriek."
Thanks!

[pompey_01]

LOL!

[capt_facepalm]

Thanks! For Basil's and Dawson's sakes, I like number three.